Denis Santos
Ang arte arte mo! Wala namang malisya.
No. It is not okay, and it will never be okay. Everyone, regardless of gender has a different take on physical contacts. May it be a touch, a pat or grope, not everyone is comfortable feeling another skin against theirs.
If you have never heard of the word personal space, it’s about time for you to search the web and be knowledgeable.
It begins with a touch
It will surely start with a friendly tap on the shoulder. But once you get more comfortable with each other, trust me, it will grow into something deeper. It’s hard. You will get confused whether all the things they are doing are out of closeness and comfortability or it’s just a way to get themselves under your skin.
It’s hard to assume anything especially when it is a friend or someone you share emotional intimacy with.
If this happens, talk to them–that it’s not okay, that you feel uncomfortable. Stop it before it turns into something dark.
No resistance never means yes
It’s an eye-roller every time we hear this excuse. ‘She did not resist, I thought it was okay.’ It is not. There will be a time when he or she would not speak up.
They are afraid to hurt your feelings or they are scared that worst may happened to them. Especially when someone’s doing it are superior to them. But for sure, they despise themselves for letting you touch them.
‘It’s in my nature’
Cut it. ‘I am touchy’ is not the way to get yourself off the hook. You have to understand that not everybody will look at it the same way you do. It may be okay for you, but it is not the case for everyone.
You might enjoy getting groped, but never hold it against someone if they feel the opposite.
It is mentally challenging
They will surely never tell you how they feel and being the insensitive that you are, you wouldn’t care. Honey, they might be thinking or hurting themselves and you still don’t know. You would not know what your gestures can do to someone.
So, if you’re not sure whether it is okay to touch anyone or not, be mindful with and of your actions. You don’t want to wake up the next morning getting headlined on Twitter, do you?
Hey, by the time you read this, you’d probably know that touching anyone without their permission is a kind of rape. What more if it is being done forcefully? Touching is considered rape even if it doesn’t include penetration of some sort.
The laws might say otherwise, but these little things you do to someone can cause emotional damage. It’s a physical and psychological abuse, no matter how you invalidate the facts.
After all, rape starts with physical contact.
